Since it’s low season now and things have slowed down I’ve decided to get back into some good habits while I have the time. I’ve been doing more yoga in the mornings and getting a good cardio in a few days a week. On top of that I learned about a company in Phuket called Clearer Cleanse, a convenient juice cleanse (you choose the number of days- 3, 7, 10) where the “juice man” brings you a cooler full of 6 different juices numbered 1-6 to your doorstep every morning. Can it get much easier than that? Now all the juices are 100% raw and organic fruits and veggies. I got my first delivery to my work this morning and have successfully drank 3 of the 6 juices so far today. Lots of water, no booze and 1 week of cleansing should have me feeling tip-top again!

I did a few days of “pre cleansing” which means I cut out meat, artificial sweeteners, caffeine and alcohol to make sure my body was ready. Now I know there’s lots of debate on whether or not cleansing is healthy for you, but from my experience eating healthy and consuming mostly a raw diet along with foods that are more alkaline than acidic won’t ever steer you wrong. But regardless, every body needs a “reboot” once in awhile. So over the next week I will write every day to let you know how I’m feeling, what my symptoms are and what I think. Let’s begin the fun:

At this time (5 pm) I’m starting to feel the effects of the detox, my stomach is rumbling a bit, not from hunger but more like it’s trying to work some things out, and I have a bit of a headache and don’t feel very clear headed. I felt great this morning after the first couple juices, but I think my body has retorted to, “wait Lauryn, where is the food? we put up with this for the first half of the day but we haven’t been doing much work today! what’s going on?!” From previously cleanses I’ve done it took the first 2 days until I started to feel amazing. But those cleanses I did on my own, so I’m anxious to see what the difference will be between this one and mine. Now I wish I had a scale so I could tell you my total weight loss, but I don’t. So I’ll just report on what I’ve noticed myself. 

Wish me luck! And happy cleansing!

www.clearercleanse.com <<<check this site out!

The last 4 months have been an adventure to say the least. I’ve been struggling a lot lately with trying to grow up and remain young at the same time. Trying to build a future and be a reliable employee yet always longing to get back on the road again and see something. Always seeking the next adventure. 

I’ve been told to “grow up”, “stop crying” and that i’m “young for my age and it’s not a bad thing”. All of these things obviously hurt at the time, but there’s some truth to everything, we just don’t always want to hear it. I know I didn’t and I don’t. But with all of those things I’m more and more encouraged to be on top of my game. At work they call me “the kid” for various reasons. The number one reason being that I’m the youngest. I’m a young instructor firstly, and I’m a kid at heart anyways. Now it hurts my feelings in various ways sometimes, but I know it’s a term of endearment and not meant to be hurtful so I try to take that in stride too.

I have always known I have a bit of a problem with authority. (ahem, that’s a given) I know I have a hard time holding my tongue if I feel I’ve been wronged or if something offends me. But for the first time I’m learning that I have to. I have to because it’s not my place, because I want to keep my job, and because it’s better for me and everyone else if I do. And this is true for everyone, sometimes it’s better to just nod and smile when inside all we wanna do is start yelling. Once again, taking it all in stride. 

But when you work for a company so closely, as a team, you’re going to have things that come up and don’t leave everyone happy. I don’t have many friends here, and even if I did I’m kinda too busy to spend too much time with anyone else. And that makes things even harder sometimes. Because when things go wrong I feel like I’m on my own, mostly because I am. 

Lately I’ve been getting really really homesick. I don’t want to be at home really, I just miss the people. I miss my family and my friends and I miss having real connections. But I love my job and I’m really starting to love Thailand even more. So those things will fall into place eventually, too. 

I read a quote the other day that said, “if life gives you lemons, it better give you some sugar and water too or you’re gonna have some really shitty lemonade”. I laughed at that one, because life always gives you lemons but you gotta take care of the sugar and the water yourself if you wanna make the lemonade (and good lemonade at that). 

Right now I’m trying to make sure I have enough sugar and water in my life to make it through when I get the lemons. I need enough time to myself, enough good chats with friends, enough time for yoga and exercise and books. Enough me time so that I can take care of the occasional hiccup- exhaustion, homesickness, loneliness. But it’s making me stronger. Although sometimes I get so sick of being strong when the tears come I end up crying for all the things I remained strong for previously. 

But as my brother, Max told me years ago, “chin up, soul light”. Thanks for that Max, I’ll keep trying. I got this.